It’s hard to believe we’re only just over a week into December. Already, the madness of November and NaNo feels like eons ago. And despite the lack of emotion and satisfaction I talked about in my previous post, I do feel like a very different person, or at least like I’m in a very different place. I look back at October and it feels like years ago.
My diminshed presence on WordPress is probably mostly due to habit – but I also feel that, in a way, I have less of a need for it now. Maybe I have accepted my achievement of the 50,000 words on a deeper level than I thought. For the past year, I have validated myself as a writer though blogging. And although I’m definitely not going to stop blogging any time soon, I feel less of a need for it.
It’s a season for change – maybe a year for change. My life is in total upheaval. And at the centre of it, I have moments of amazing calm, amazing certainty that I am in the right place right now. I don’t believe in fate or destiny, but feelings of belonging and contentedness and connectedness are things I’ve been searching for for a long time. Maybe I’m actually getting close.
I’ve been doing a lot of thinking and reading and development in terms of my (albeit atheistic) spirituality – though for some reason I don’t feel that this is the place to talk about that. So there are internal changes happening with the external ones. I am striving to become the person I have always expected to be some time in the future. But with my 24th birthday, something clicked with me that I will never become her if I don’t start moving in the right direction now.
I was going to write a post about Christmas, and I will in the next few days. But for now, this rambling fragment will have to do. To regular readers – I’m sorry I have been neglecting your blogs! I do miss reading everyone’s posts, and I’ll get back to it at some point. But right now, I’m not in a mood for forcing it.
Believing you are in the place you are supposed to be is wonderful! All the best to you in 2013!
Blessings ~ Wendy
It is, and I’m very greatful for it! Thank you, and the same to you :)
Definitely don’t force it! It’s great that you’re just going with how you feel and doing what’s right for you. Good luck with all of the changes! :)
Thank you, it means a lot :)
Change is great. Do what you’ve got to do, Aine!
Thank you! :)
Hello! I don’t know if you participate in the awards on WP or not, but I nominated your work for a Liebster Award! More details can be found here: http://fictionalmachines.com/very-inspiring-blogger-award-round-two/liebster-award-round-five/ Have a great day! :)